Ntando Mhlongo’s story of triumph has awakened many people who suffer in silence to seek help and access health care regardless of the severity of their health conditions. Picture: TikTok
It is common when an individual undergoes a rough patch in life to be socially withdrawn for fear of being stigmatized especially if their manhood and dignity are at stake.
However, Ntando Mhlongo’s story is a testimony of resilience, self-determination and hope. From the time I first saw him in one of the podcasts, called Thuleleni TV (from Youtube), being supported by a caring, empathetic man, Mr. Mduduzi Mkhwanazi, in his journey filled with mixed emotions, about three weeks ago, and on television, I remembered that nothing could replace the principle of Ubuntu. Ubuntu embraces interconnectedness, communal living, shared values and love. Contrary to the rejection and cyberbullying from the social media when one has rare health condition, Ntando painted a picture of courage and resilience. Never did he attach his condition to sorcery or ubuthakathi (in IsiZulu).
Living with a scrotal swelling or hydrocele, a medical condition affecting men, it must have been a challenge for Ntando, a 30-year-old from KwaZulu-Natal (KZN) province, who narrated his ordeal of six years. Statistically, three in 10 men are susceptible to suffer from it and the most vulnerable are men in their 30s until 50s. To date, several studies on men’s health demonstrate poor quality of life and depression following the diagnosis of prostrate cancer, which is mostly known, but there is dearth of research of resilience and psychological well-being among South African men who encountered scrotal swelling.
Depression, on the other hand, can negatively impact on the cognitive, emotional, behavioural and physical domains. Worrying too much about the health condition could lead to self- exploitation, lack of sleep (insomnia), forgetfulness, irrational thinking, irregular eating patterns, suicidal ideation, severe headache, diabetes and weak immune system. In most cases, when individuals experience major depression, they engage in alcohol and other illicit drugs, and in that way their resiliency effect gets depleted. However, remarkable Ntando continued to hold his head high. To save his eight-year-old son from being ostracised by his peers, he stopped to accompany him when going to play soccer.
People with resilience often thrive and bounce back in the face of adversity. Owing to their positive self-esteem such as Ntando’s, they do not ruminate nor engulf in self-pity. In their pursuit of adaptation, they remain optimistic, self-compassionate and seek help. Considering that scrotal swelling in many culturally embedded societies is associated with witchcraft or ancestral curses, people might have labelled him as promiscuous or reaping the fruits of having impregnated women and denied paternity.
Coupled with solid support structures such as quality friends, families and community, research shows that they navigate through life with fortitude. Amongst the qualities he exemplified until he went for the hydrocelectomy surgery at La Verna Private Hospital in Ladysmith (KZN), faith, humility, gratitude, purpose in life and self-acceptance dominated. This would not have been made possible without the financial support and prayers of many people who poured their hearts to God for wisdom in the urologists and nurses who diligently restored life. Most importantly, Ntando’s courage defied the Bazothini Syndrome, when publicly sharing his condition without feeling hopeless and helpless.
Bazothini syndrome, is simply the fear of the negative criticism that is linked to the destruction of one’s self-esteem and sense of self-worth. However, Ntando continued to radiate positive energy and enjoyed himself by even going to the beach.
Undoubtedly, his story of triumph has awakened many people who suffer in silence to seek help and access health care regardless of the severity of their health conditions. As I add my wishes for Ntando’s recovery, may he restructure his life, personal goals and dreams as if he never experienced a setback.
* Professor Jabulani Gilford Kheswa: Department of Psychology, University of Fort Hare.
** The views expressed do not necessarily reflect the views of IOL or Independent Media.